And the Winner Is...

Nothing! Nada!

Tests found not a sign of Strep in the back of my throat. Which is a good thing, I suppose. Yet somehow that makes it a tad worse, 'cause I was hoping that strep was it, I could get the proper meds, and knock this thing out.

Unfortunately, I am not getting much better. My eyes have not been responding to the little eyedrops that have worked wonders on my kiddos( so good to see those clear baby blues each day), and despite the Wifes best efforts to hydrate the hell out of me in hopes of drowning the bug out, it has stuck with me like glue. And I'm serious about the glue part. That's the consistency of everything I've been clearing. I went through a box and a half of Kleenex today with blowing the nose and hacking crap out of my lungs. Yet there seems to be no end to the goop. Buckets of greenish, brownish, glue like globs.

On top of this fun, the blowing of my nose coupled with the filling of my ear canals has led to me blowing out my eardrums in a most painful manner. Imagine going flying, higher and higher and just waiting until your eardrums equalized themselves with the pressure. Or diving to great depths doing the same. Or if you prefer sea level and are feeling a bit masochistic, pinch your nose shut and pretend to blow it (keep the mouth closed too) as hard as you can until your eardrums feel like they've been pushed out into the little swirl of open ear, exposed to air and light for the first time in their lives. Don't worry Ma, I've checked, nothing is hanging out. While both of my eardrums have been invaded by goop and while the left is definitely louder than the right, they are both ringing in an extremely unpleasant, and dizzyingly dischordant tri-tone ring that is literally keeping me awake.

I've had a few sinus infections in the past few years, and even a nice case of walking pneumonia. But I have not felt this bad for this long since... since... well, as far back as I can remember.

I'm going to attempt sleep tonight. If this isn't much better when the sun comes up, I'm calling my regular doc and setting something up. Something's gotta give here, and it really can't be me!

On the up side, the Wife has been treating me like a prince. Meals catered to my easy chair (an excellent homemade chicken noodle soup, and tonight a chicken quesadilla casserole that you really should get the receipe for, cause it is outstanding) She's been bringing me drink after drink of hot chocolate, hot tea with honey, ice cold milk and even juice of the orange this morning. She believes (and I agree) that the more fluids go in, the more crap will come out one end or the other. And it has been working! I should weigh the crap I cleared today. It might just be a new record! She has been a saint. Even though one of her top reasons for bringing things to me is so that I don't touch anything and spread whatever this is to her or the kiddos. I still appreciate the heck out of it, cause every time I get up, the feel of the clothing on my skin causes an uncomfortable sunburn like ache throughout that largest organ. (the skin, you sicko) So the less I have to move, the better.

Now, time to wipe down the keyboard with the bleach and water mixture she whipped up for anything I touch, and then a nice hot shower, which still hurts the skin, but at least clears some sinus goo. Then an attempt at bed. The hacking, lung tossing cough every few minutes probably hasn't helped the Wife's sleeping patterns, so I'm going to sleep in the easy chair for as long as I can tolerate it, quietly singing to myself Maria's song from West Side Story, except substituting a 'sh' sound in place of the 'puh' sound in 'I Feel Pretty'.

Here's hoping the sunrise brings clear mucus, clear sinuses, clear lungs, clear ears, clear eyes, clear throat, clear urine, and what the hell, clear skies as well.

More Later