I was wanting to save my 200th post for something profound or an amazing event. Perhaps logging a feat of some incredible sort. Turns out I'm a pretty ordinary guy, with a pretty extraordinary life, and sometimes the most amazing, profound, incredible things happen not during great expeditions or worldwide events, but in the day to day musings of a four year old boy and a ten month old girl.
In the world of adults I am faced almost daily with deceit, hypocrisy, guile, ulterior motives, dishonesty, low integrity, lack of honor. I miss sometimes the Marines I served with because of their honor, integrity, courage and commitment. The Marine without these was rare. But it seems in the civilian world, finding a civilian with those traits is the lesser known.
With my children, I don't have to guess at their motives or honesty. They are like little Marines. Able to speak honestly and openly, in English or Babble. Without the two facedness that many people today seem to wear with such ease.
I live my life like that. Open, honest. And I miss my kids and my wife when I'm not near them, because they do the same.
The Boyo has been learning courtesy and consideration, right and wrong. He's quick to call me on my transgressions, but not in a mean or hurtful way. But gently, as his mother and I correct him. The other day I was mixing up a few cups of Strawberry Milk, a favorite of his and of mine. Sometimes the Boyo helps stir, and he stirs with the wreckless abandon of a four year old. Often there is liquid everywhere, much to his delight. And when he goes "stir crazy" my response is the same.
"OK now. That's enough, that's enough. Let's stop stirring for now."
The other day I was talking to the Wife as I stirred. A few drops of the frothy pink goodness sloshed over the rim and trickled down the side. Suddenly his little voice piped up...
"OK Daddy. That's enough, that's enough." Completely charming.
He is an astute observer, and a sponge of all that happens around him. He happily takes on the characters of our favorite DVD's and gives their voices to whatever action figure or toy he is playing with. So the pirate ship has Rob Petrie for a captain, Laura Petrie and Buddy Sorrell and Sally Rogers as crew. The Lego ship carries Mr. Magorium and Mahoney, and perhaps "Lightning BaQueen" as well. The cast will then carry on a conversation, sailing and adventuring. Correcting each other gently for saying things they shouldn't or making bad choices. Rejoicing, often loudly, when the choices are good or they've behaved. He's a riot to watch.
Our little girl is starting to come in to her own as well. She emotes well. Frustration, sadness, giddy happy, excitement. It's all in her face and eyes. She chants "Ma ma ma ma ma" as she crawls towards the Wife. I am rewarded with an occasional "Da da", which melts my heart. Or the less friendly "Shet" which is either the naughty excrement word, or just random sound. I think it is the latter, as we are very careful as to what words we use around our little language sponge, for he will indeed repeat any questionable prose at the least opportune time. The Sweet Pea lights up like a supernova when mommy or I appear, and I know what true love is.
Then there's this whole space thing. International Year of Astronomy. That's all thanks to Galileo who back in 1609 borrowed a Dutch telescope design and tweaked it to work better. No doubt the guy was a genius. And thanks to my Sis for taking me to the observatory and reigniting my uber-space-nerd and leading me back to wanting to build a huge telescope to observe the heavens, and wanting to find an easier way to see black sky at some point in life.
And as I've said before, Space is Big. Big in a way that makes me feel like many things here just don't matter but at all. All the drama at work... who cares. The life and death nature of my job... eh- it's just a job. Whole galaxies are colliding right now, stars are dying, cosmic events happening that make me compare my life and eventual demise to how a fruit fly must see me. So again I focus on what is true and important.
Sweetiest of the Sweets
their spouses and kids
Those are the main players in this show of a life of mine. I have friends of course, and they rank right in there as secondary characters. (Some appearing more often than others, some I wish would reappear and hang around for awhile) There are tertiary characters playing the parts of the inevitable antagonists. And like most villains, they are not as two dimensional as they appear to be in this show. They too have their good side, their friends and their aspirations. But for some reason in my show, they are the ones presenting me with interpersonal challenges. But you know what? They really don't matter. In the grand scheme of my life, they really don't.
So the joys in life are what I am leaning towards more and more. Working in the shop, creating, thinking, inventing, snuggling, laughing.
Pondering the size of the universe has the strange effect of focusing my view into things as small as enjoying a warm sunny breeze on a coolish near spring day.
Of course, thirty one hours without much more than a few hours of rest also lead to ramblings like this, my 200th post. Good luck making much sense of it.
I did have a couple of really good ideas that I should write down and revisit when I'm rested to confirm whether or not they were actually good ideas, or exhaustion induced ideas comparable to a really high Pineapple Express type guy thinking "Dude, that's a really good idea!"
Tomorrow will tell.
Thanks my true family, born into our blood or not, you are the ones who are really important.